Frequently Asked Questions

Since so many of you have asked the same questions in the past 48 hours, we thought we'd take a crack at a proper "FAQ" document for HumaneWatch. We'll update it periodically. This is version 1.0.

Q. Can I add you to my blogroll, link to you, or pass your press release around on my favorite Yahoo Group list?
A. Sure. Thanks for helping more people find HumaneWatch.

Q. Will you add my blog/website to your "recommended reading" list?
A. Maybe. But only if we think it adds something interesting (or at least amusing) to this discussion. If it's 100% about PETA, the answer is no.

Q. Why aren't you doing this sort of roto-rooter job on PETA anyway?
A. Because PETA has become an irrelevant sideshow. Its primary purpose these days is to make HSUS seem reasonable by comparison.

Q. This is a big project. Are you hiring any help?
A. The Center for Consumer Freedom is always looking for clever, motivated researchers who can write well. E-mail me privately and I'll let you know where to send your materials.

Q. Are you sure the Humane Society of the United States doesn't run any pet shelters?
A. Yes.

Q. You're an evil %#&(*#@, aren't you?
A. We file down the horns every morning. Right after we hug a baby seal and rub a kitten's tummy.

Q. Wayne Pacelle says you're supported by cockfighters. Is he on drugs?
A. We wouldn't want to speculate. But if Pacelle told me the sky was blue, I'd look out my window just to double-check.

Q. Can I make copies of the materials in your "Document Library"?
A. Sure. That's why the library is there.

Q. So, Mr. Smarty-Pants, what do you do to help animals?
A. We give money to local humane societies—at least two each year. They're the ones doing all the heavy lifting. And they don't get a dime from HSUS. Plus, we're writing this blog. We're hoping more people will donate money to groups near where they live instead of sending it to Washington. That would be a great result for animals.

Q. Why do vegetarians insist on making their "roasts," "burgers," and "dogs" in the shape of real meat? (I've never seen ground beef molded into the shape of a bell pepper or a head of broccoli.)
A. You've got me there. Ask Paul Shapiro.

Image: Details from "Animal Alphabet Poster" by Decoylab